Community

In LA I found an amazing community that changed my life (I’m not being extreme, every interaction effects our lives, even if just minutely). I have been so fortunate to have wise Professors, Pastors and other leaders and friends who have shaped me through their actions and words. My growth and maturation has come through relationships more than any other avenue (which may cause you to wonder why I’m spending over 2 decades in formalized education but one of education’s greatest assets is the thoughtful community it offers). I am grateful for having enough self-worth to be teachable early on; and for being surrounded by people who communicate honestly and have not been afraid to confront, encourage and seek help. I’ve been fortunate to get to serve and lead, as well as listen and learn.

Leaving an amazing community in LA to come to Wheaton I realized how vital community is for my health and growth and diligently sought it here. I did everything I could to have community waiting for me here in Illinois, and the College had far more opportunities waiting for me. All of this has caused me to reflect on community.

You cannot truly live without being in community; to be completely isolated is death. Community is core to the meaning of life. We are alive to commune together and to commune with the one who created all of us and became like us, humbling Himself to come close and reconcile us with Himself. To live the abundant life we were created to live we must be reconciled with the One who formed us and longs to gather us to Himself. To know Him is to love Him, and to love Him is to love all that He has made. Therefore we must be reconciled to each other, to learn to love All of His children with the love He has poured on us (Oh if we would soften our selves and invite His love in). The beauty in being reconciled with each other is as we build relationships with people who are different from us (which is all people) we realize that they experience life and God with a different perspective than we do and we grow in wisdom and understanding as we commune with them. We also learn a great deal about ourselves in community as our rough edges (or our humanity) rub against the rough edges of others and we choose to become smooth. We see our reflection in the actions and words of others. We are so profoundly freed of ourselves when we serve others. When we seek to bless and lift up our brothers and sisters we are liberated from depression, selfishness and all the destruction that is birthed out of self-focus. Community is powerful.

When I was on tour in Canada I asked an elderly man, with whom I was staying, what was it that shaped his family into the wonderful family that he had (because in my time with them I was impressed by the health and wisdom of their family). After thinking about it he came back to me with the answer, which was not what I expected to hear. He told me community. Community is what kept him married for more than half a century. Community is what shaped his children into loving people of integrity and maturity. For in community he found the warm arms of accountability and encouragement holding he and his wife together. In community his kids were exposed to people of wisdom who shaped them at every encounter they had.

I stayed with a similar family in Boston that rented out most of their house to people who wanted to be intentional about being in community together. I sat at dinner with them as they discussed ways they could serve their community (they already had a community garden and different community events regularly). I saw how valuable community is in accomplishing your goals. At Central City Community Outreach where I worked this last year we could not have functioned without community. We needed every skill, every part of the Church to serve those we endeavored to serve in LA. We could not have functioned without those with skills in: teaching, administration, construction and much much more. The gifts I have are not sufficient to adequately serve those I desire to serve; I need others.

I need people not just to join with me in service but also in mentoring relationships, which elicit growth (which enriches how I serve). It is vital that I be speaking into people’s lives and that I spend time with people who speak into mine. Healthy community has everyone being mentored/discipled and also mentoring/discipling. Now that I’m in Wheaton I am actively seeking wise people that I would want to be mentored by. I know the great value of having someone further in their journey of life guide me and equip me. I also am seeking relationships and opportunities for me to pour into the lives of others that I might be a good steward of that which I have learned (not to mention the benefits I get out of it). Recently I was talking to a friend and peer about feeling ill-equipped to lead and speak into people’s lives because of our great deficits in wisdom and maturity. Yet we concluded that it is a lie that we will ever reach some point of proper maturity from which we can serve. Those who enter community with that mind are difficult to approach and confront and are blind to the reality of their own life and therefore those of others. We are imperfect, welcome to humanity. But we must serve and engage in community.

I urge you to seek the community I have described for yourself. Deal with wounds and misconceptions that cause you to flee community and make you afraid to trust. If you have been hurt (and we all have been) seek healing. I know the Great Physician and through His Spirit and His people I know He will restore you. Invest in the communities you’re in. A major part of life is simply showing up; just going to the places where people can build into you and you can engage. Be wise and guard your heart. Be careful of premature self-disclosure. Yet invest, don’t always run back to safety and limit your ability to build solid community. Learn to be present with people. To truly engage them. To really listen instead of thinking about yourself and your distractions. Know your worth so you can be truly aware of others.

If you are reading this you are part of my life and have had a hand in shaping me through community, for that I thank you. I pray our Lord fills you with His healing, love, wisdom and boldness as you seek the wonderful life He’s prepared for us.